Nathan Fillion Joining Lost!!!

If you ever watched Buffy or Firefly, you know how smoking hot Nathan Fillion is. And he was even hot on Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place. Well, Kristin at E! is saying that Nathan is joining lost as...SPOILER...Kate's husband!

Elisabeth on The View

How long do you think ABC will keep whiny Elisabeth on The View? Watch this clip and see how inarticulate Elisabeth is trying to argue that gun control shouldn't be tightened.

I'll give you that it's hard to argue against three people at once, but she's still a whiny, squeaky-voiced moron.

Battlestar Goodness

I'm so excited about the 2-hour season premiere of Battlestar Galactica on SciFi tonight that I can barely contain myself. By the way, check on the guns on Apollo. Grrr...

Foley and DC

Here in DC, everyone seems to be talking about Foley. I just think the whole scandal is sad and am torn by how I feel.

• I'm happy for a number of things: a) this is another tip toward Democratic control of the House come November; b) an alleged criminal is now out of congress; c) that anyone who knew about this and did nothing is going to take a fall.
• But I'm equally sad that: a) gays get unfairly slammed as "pedophiles" and "child molesters;" and b) that a project as noble as the Page Program in DC can be turned on its side by one nut.

I just hope that the blame game stops and we actually try to fix what is wrong and find out why it wasn't fixed earlier.

Hope for Lost?

I'm not ready to say that Lost has finally wandered in from its cold and lonely wayward path, but I will say that this week's season premiere was fantastic. I'm still skeptical that the creators and showrunners (especially with their penchant to leave for other projects) will devote enough time to the show. But how great was it to see how the Others live on the island? And we finally got some explanations for the polar bears.

So at least Lost has started this season out on a good foot.

Robert Altman's New Project

I read today that Robert Altman's newest movie is going to be based on the 1997 documentary Hands on a Hard Body. Elke made me see the documentary in which a number of people who are competing to win a car inside a texas mall by standing with one hand always touching a Nissan truck. (You thought "hard body" was naughty didn't you?)

Well, this kind of film will have built in tension as to who wins. Bu more importantly, for Altman, the film will afford him the opportunity to do what he does best: focus on characters not plot. It's not even in production yet and I'm excited. In the meantime, go rent Hands on a Hard Body.

Don't Forget Lost Tonight!

It seems like a zillion years since the season finale of Lost. But I'm hearing great great murmurs about tonight's season premiere episode. Even a little hint that a character may come out of the closet. Hmmm...

Also, ABC premiere's its new show The Nine tonight. It has gotten good reviews, but looks like a yawner to me.

Veronica Mars and Battlestar Galactica

What do these two shows have in common you ask? Well, last night on the season premiere of Veronica Mars (which rocked it really hard), Veronica learned to use the Battlestar Galactica curse word "frack." You can pretty much get what word "frack" replaces. Anyway...it was a cute shout-out. I hope Veronica gets great ratings.

Also...this Friday is the season premiere of SciFi's Battlestar Galactica. I can't wait to see what happens. But the network is catching new viewers up with an hour-long episode repeating a zillion times this week called Battlestar Galactica: The Story So Far.

You owe it to yourself to catch up on this show (the best drama on tv) and start watching!

I'm Back

Okay...after some out of town travel, sad family business, and moving into my new condo, I'm back and ready to blog. The new TV season is in full bloom and here are some initial thoughts.

• I'm really digging Heroes, Ugly Betty, Jericho, and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.
• Vanished, Kidnapped, and Smith didn't live up to the hype.
• The jury is still out on Brothers and Sisters and Six Degrees. I think both shows had/have great potential but I'm not all that impressed.
• Veronica Mars season premiere is tonight. You'd better check it out!

Eat a Cockroach at Six Flags

How about that for a blog entry title? I'm coming back from a week with family, and then a business trip, and I close on a condo this weekend. Soon I'll be back to fine blogging form and can address all the new TV shows. But in the meantime, I saw this article on CNN about a cockroach-eating Six Flags promotion. Our society is clearly fucked up.

I'm Away from the Blog, but Will Be Back

I'm away for work and for family business for a few days but will blogging about the new tv season (and so much more) soon. Come back next week!

Design Star

Well, hottie David won Design Star which wasn't too much of a surprise. But I'll be honest, the more they showed him talking and taking his shirt off, I did begin to agree with my friends: David has an ego for days. His sweety sweetness is a little sachrine.

Katie Couric and Rosie O'Donnell

Well, after watching the first round of Couric on the CBS Evening News, I have to say I wasn't all that impressed. I do have a few thoughts about it:

• She's had an eye-lift.
• She has a great camera presence.
• The show is really less news than ever. It seemed way too gimicky and like Access Hollywood. Ugh.

Now, on to Rosie on The View. In just a few short days since her debut on the show, she's shown herself to be (not surprisingly) the loudest, the goofiest, and the most pointed. I have a feeling the show will continue to evolve. My guess is that stupid Elizabeth (I'm a no-thinking fundamentalist) will leave before the end of the year. And then I'm even thinking the staltwart Joy will either leave the show later, or tone down her schtick. Right now she and Rosie are just too much alike.

Ellen to Host Oscars

Can you believe it's already time to talk about the Oscars? Well, not really. But the good news is that Ellen DeGeneres is hosting this year for the first time. I actually think her glib sense of humor is a great match for the Oscars. She's snarky, but smart and funny too.

Vincent is Gone!

Praise Jesus! I have been waiting for weeks for the talentless Vincent to be kicked off Project Runway and last night God answered my prayers! I think the producers thought Vincent made good tv, so they kept him on. But really all he did was creep everyone out and spin out of control. If you watched last night, you saw Vincent not-so-subtlely come on to the French judge. Anyway...good riddance!

Design Star to Name its Star

This upcoming Sunday HGTV's Design Star will name the designer who will host a new show on the network. You can go to the website to vote between David (mmmm) and Alice. Both are great, but David's designs will really blow you away by how good they are. Look at pics from the challenge where he decorated a room by shopping at a pet store. David is a winner--and hot to boot!

Osama and Bush

I just had a horrifying thought today as I was reading about how the Republican party is just tanking in our country: imagine what happens if somehow the President and his cronies are able to pull Osama bin Laden out of their asses before the November elections? It seems like so many more people are finally waking up to the realities of the crazy Iraq war. A majority of Americans can now see how Bush and his peeps have no foreign or domestic policy worth talking about. But if by some strange chance Bush and his minions happen to stumble upon Osama before the elections, everything could change at the drop of a hat. Ugh.

Check Out Bones

If you aren't watching Bones on Fox, then you're missing out. Only one episode into its second season, the show and its leads have really gelled. David Boreanaz and Emily Deschanel have a great chemistry, and the show's writing and stories have gotten better and better. Do yourself a favor and give it a try!

Tom Cruise Reaching for Any Kind of Life Raft

That's what it seems like to me. After the devastating embarrassment of being called to the carpet by one of the Viacom/Paramount heads, Tom Cruise's stock is lower than it's been in probably 15 years. There's no new movie to promote, and his new deal with Six Flags and the Redskins owner to produce movies has been met with little enthusiasm. So to stay in the news, and help his dismal approval ratings, Cruise decides it's time to apologize to Brooke Shields.

Yep. Shields says, "And through it all, I was so impressed with how heartfelt it was. And I didn't feel at any time that I had to defend myself, nor did I feel that he was trying to convince me of anything other than the fact that he was deeply sorry. And I accepted it."

Sounds to me like Cruise is doing whatever he can to salvage a career and some respect. My guess is we won't see any wonky behavior captured on Oprah or tv of Cruise any time soon. Maybe even no press releases dealing with Scientology.

Bye, Bye Fat Momma

I was so sad last night that Fat Momma didn't win Sci Fi's Who Wants to be a Superhero. If you didn't follow the reality show, it was a great mix of crazy, earnest contestants and zany elimination challenges. Fat Momma (see pic) is a 42 year-old mother who is overweight and can turn 5 times her size by eating a donut. She's fantastic, but she lost to Feedback, a nerdy geek who has always wanted to be a superhero.

My question is, where else are you going to see a fat, black woman superhero with a huge heart? Nowhere....I'm sad.

Bye, Bye, Angela

I'm not really all that disappointed that Angela was kicked off Project Runway tonight, but I'm a bit bummed big-necked Jeffrey is still on. I was hoping it would be his night to get the boot, but instead he won.

All the twists this season have been great--from designing clothes for a dog to getting whisked off to Paris to see how travel-ready their garments are. The only thing that could spoil the season would be if Jeffrey or Vincent won, but I can't see that happening--knock on wood.

Pick a Katie Couric

Several news outlets are reporting that CBS has doctored a promotional photo of their new star Katie Couric to make her look thinner. You can see it here.

Katie hasn't even started the real job yet and there is already a scandal. I bet she's pissed.

Mute Button for Celebrity Duets

A few thoughts on last night's premiere of Celebrity Duets:

• Waaaaaay too long a premiere episode. Went by deathly slow. Not sure I'll watch a whole show again.
• The celebrities got better on their second time around, but did you notice that the real singers didn't much want to be on the show? They barely talked to camera, and it was pretty clear they hadn't really practiced with the stars. Dancing with the Stars works because there is a rapport between the celebs and the dancers. No rapport here though.
• Marie Osmond isn't funny, isn't smart, and is just kind of blah as a judge. And while Little Richard got off to a slow start, his excited stuttering and crazy gay come-ons appeared later in the show. He is fantastic to watch in a train wreck kind of way.
• I love Hal Sparks. Always have, always will. But he needs to stop screaming into the microphone.
• As for Jai Rodriguez, I was wrong. He's not a no-talent: he can sing. And actually, should he even be on the show as a non-singing celeb? His first big career break was a lead in the Broadway musical Rent! I smell a ringer!
• My brother called me three times during the show last night. Neither one of us could believe the absolutely hideous "songs" and "notes" coming out of Lea Thompson's and Carly Patterson's mouths. It was cringe-inducing.

Celebrity Duets on Tonight

I'm giddy with anticipation at the thought of watching Hal Sparks, Cheech Marin, and Lucy Lawless sing on live television. Throw in some other C and D list celebrities and a few surprise musicians, and tonight's Celebrity Duets on Fox certainly has all the earmarks of a fabulous reality show. The only drawback is having to actually listen and/or see Jai Rodriguez from Queer Eye. I pray he doesn't talk in his mock-sensitive voice or try to be funny. We all know how much of a no-talent I think he is.

Matt LeBlanc at a Stripper's House

It was pretty crazy for NBC to think that people would be so desperate for anything Friends-related that they would voluntarily watch Matt LeBlanc's show Joey last year. Sure, the character of Joey had his funny moments with the other friends, but he was certainly the weak link (chacter-wise and as an actor).

Well, last year in August, Matt LeBlanc admitted to hooking up with a stripper at a private room in a club and after a teary apology to his wife, he still ended up getting divorced a few months later. Well now the stripper is saying that the action wasn't at the club at all--Matt came back to her house! And she's suing him for defamation for what he said to the Enquirer in 2005. Ouch! I say it's fitting for a no-talent like LeBlanc. Good riddance.

Entourage Seaon Finale

It's heartbreaking to think about waiting until January to see Entourage again. It has got to be one of the funniest, snarkiest, most enjoyable shows on television. Watching Jeremy Piven jump up and down and scream is cathartic. And if you saw last night's episode, you know that somehow Ari is going to get the boys back in his corner when the new season starts in 07. They may have fired Ari, but he'll be Vince's agent again soon enough.

No DNA Match for JonBenet Suspect

John Mark Karr's DNA clears him? Well that's a shocker! The guy is certainly nuts, but did anybody really think he was the killer? No way.

Emmy Hits and Misses

I haven't had time to fully digest the Emmy winners from last night, but here are my preliminary thoughts:

• Rock on Helen Mirren for winning actress in a miniseries. She's an amazing actress, she looked noble and beautiful and she had the best joke the night, "the real accomplishment is making up these steps and not going feet over tits."
• Also...kudos to Jeremy Piven for his first win. He even got teary in his speech. The only negative was that ascot thing he was wearing instead of a tie.
• And who would've thunk it that Julia Louis-Dreyfus would win? I was excited for her.
• 24 took best drama, directing, and acting for Kiefer Sutherland. That was a surprise to everyone.
• Sooooo happy West Wing got shut out, especially Allison Janey. And in that vein, also tickeld that William Shatner didn't win or anything from Curb Your Enthusiasm.
• I was a bit sad that Mariska Hargitay won best actress over Frances Conroy from Six Feet Under. Seems like everyone in Hollywood thought Kyra Sedwick had it locked.
• Oh, and even with its crapass family season, The Amazing Race somehow beat out Project Runway. That was kind of nuts too!
• Wasn't too excited that Sandra Oh or Chandra Wilson didn't win for Grey's Anatomy. Don't get me wrong, I love the winner Blythe Danner (who has more talent in her pinky finger that her "I'm so arty" daughter Gwenyth. But I really don't like the show Huff.

Who the Emmys Missed

Every year the Emmys miss some great actors and it's just a shame. But in a parallel dimension somewhere, all these people were nominated and I was really happy:

• Lauren Graham, best actress in a comedy, Gilmore Girls. The buzz is that the Emmy rules were changed this year in part to help her get a nod because WB and UPN can't ever get nominations. But Lauren submitted a strangely whiney episode and didn't get the nomination.
• Kristen Bell, best actress in a drama, Veronica Mars. This girl has taken away a bit of the sting of Buffy being off the air. She's really quirky, funny, and downright talented.
• Edie Falco, best actress in a drama, The Sopranos. Yes, she's won before. But this was her best year ever. I was shocked she wasn't given a nod.
• Jeremy Piven, best actor in a comedy, Entourage. I have no idea why he was nominated instead for supporting actor.
• Mary McDonnell, best supporting actress in a drama, Battlestar Galactica. Folks, the show (and Mary) are just that good.
• Terry O'Quinn (Locke) and Josh Holloway (Sawyer) are both fantastic on Lost. They should get supporting actor noms.
• Marcia Cross, best actress in a comedy, Desperate Housewives. She was robbed, robbed I tell you. This year there was almost nothing good about the show, except for Bree. She had some fantastic scenes.
• Ellen Pompeo, best actress in a drama, Grey's Anatomy. The show has gotten so many kudos, but really the character of Meredith is the linchpin. Her deep sorrow, her goofiness, and issues hold the show together. I think the role is flashy, but certainly hard to play.

More Words for Lindsay Lohan

"You can't show up late...It's very, very disrespectful," William H. Macy said of Lindsay Lohan on the press junket for his new movie Everyone's Hero. He continues, "I think what an actor has to realize...when you show up an hour late, 150 people have been scrambling to cover for you. There is not an apology big enough in the world to have to make 150 people scramble. It's nothing but disrespect. And Lindsay Lohan is not the only one. A lot of actors show up late as if they're God's gift to the film. It's inexcusable, and they should have their asses kicked."

Ouch! Rock on, William H.

I Don't Think Taylor Hicks is Gay...

One of the tabloids recently had an article about Taylor Hicks' sordid gay past. I don't believe it--there's no way he's a homo. But it turns out that Hicks' former Alabama producer has been selling Taylor's old songs on iTunes and when Taylor got a judge to stop the songs, the producer got nasty. He said he had turned down big-time money offers to talk of Taylor's lurid sexual and drug-using past. Eeek.

Lost Scoop on E! Online

Kristin at E! Online just visited the set of Lost and has some juicy tidbits to share today. They include:

• Desmond, Henry Gale, and Tom Cruise's cousin (Ethan) will all play a large part in the story this season.
• The hatch is gone. No more. The set is pulled down so we won't see it anymore.
• Could Claire be Jack's half-sister?
• The Others live in a crazy location (not those tents) that we haven't seen yet.
• We'll find this season why Locke was wheelchair-bound.

Emmy Ponderings

I've been waiting to talk about the Emmys because the nominations came out months before this weekend's awards and the nominee ommissions were more glaring than usual. For a complete list of nominations you can visit GoldDerby.com. Tomorrow I'll mention people who should have been nominated. But here are my musings on this year's nominees:

• Fantastic that Jeremy Piven was nominated for Entourage. But why supporting? That makes ab-so-lute-ly no sense. Everyone knows he's the heart of the show.
• Glad to see that Grey's Anatomy did so well: a best drama series nomination and props to Sandra Oh and Chandra Wilson for supporting nods.
• Rock on, Lisa Kudrow (The Comeback), Jean Smart (24), and Steve Carrell (The Office)--all under-appreciated actors.
• Nice that no one forgot about Peter Krause and Frances Conroy in the final season of Six Feet Under. They're up for actor and actress. And cheers to remembering Arrested Development up for best comedy.
• But I can't can't can't believe The West Wing get nominated as best drama for it's lousy final season. And Allison Janney might have had a great last episode, but she almost never on the show last season. Honestly, she could crap on the toilet for a whole episode and they would still give her an Emmy.
• How did Alfre Woodard get nominated for a ridiculous ridiculous role and performance on Desperate Housewives? And Stockard Channing got nominated for best actress in her Out of Practice show which had like 3 episodes before getting canceled!

The Emmys got a lot of (deserved) crap from critics for the crazy nominations this year. The judging system was changed, but the votes still seem arbitrary with people voting for shows or performances they have never seen. Probably the biggest uproar in the nominations has been Ellen Burstyn's supporting actress nomination for HBO's miniseries Mrs. Harris. Turns out Burstyn is only in the movie for a total of 14 seconds in an unnamed role. The people who voted simply saw her name and said, "Oh, Ellen Burstyn! I know her from movies. She must be good in this."

The Best Project Runway Ever!

I'm not kidding. Last night's episode was so good that I had to spontaneously react and chat with strangers, sweaty strangers, at the gym. The designers found out that they had to design for an "everyday woman" and then their own mothers and sisters marched out on the runway as their models! Of course there was a catch: the designers had to design for someone else's mom or sis. Ack!

A few thoughts:

• Somehow Vincent won the challenge, which is nuts because his dress wasn't that pretty. It should have been Uli's glamorous, stylish piece.
• I still say (as I've said from day 1) Uli will win the whole shebang.
• I was sad to see Robert (and his mole) leave the show, but he really hasn't created anything of note lately. So his exit wasn't that much of a surprise.
• Wasn't it funny how alike the designers and their mothers were? Whether they looked alike, or acted alike, it made me laugh.
• A (sweaty) woman at the gym got pissed when fuckhead Jeffrey berated Angela's mother. The gym lady said, "If I were Angela, I would bitchslap his ass."
• I think the bitchslap-deserving Jeffrey will be the next to leave the runway. I hope so anyway!

Sticking it to Tom Cruise

Pretty hilarious that the same day Paramount drops Tom Cruise on his flat ass, the studio hires the South Park creators. Remember Tom has had it in for the guys since this year's "Trapped in the Closet" episode of South Park devoted to Scientology. It realllly sucks to be Tom Cruise today.

Stargate SG-1 Not Dead

I was a bit sad yesterday when I heard that Stargate SG-1 was being cancelled at the end of this (it's 10th) season on Sci Fi. I mean, how was I going to get a weekly fix of Ben Browder? But it turns out that MGM, the company that owns the franchise, is looking to have the series move toward television movies and possibly even another feature film. (Remember the tv show is based on the 1994 movie with Kurt Russell and James Spader). And...some of the main characters may just migrate to the newer show Stargate Atlantis.

Schadenfreude Delight

About a month ago we talked about how Tom Cruise's usual huge money deal with Paramount was about to be whittled down. Well, I guess I was wrong. Turns out, Paramount has fired Tom Cruise flat-out. Viacom head Sumner Redstone says of Cruise, "His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Paramount." Fan-fucking-tastic!

Look for a tiny trail of red in tonight's starry sky. It's Tom Cruise's ego as it falls to earth from its degrading orbit. Now Tom's ego can soar at the same true height as his star status: the front porch light of the Church of Scientology headquarters.

When the Levees Broke

If you didn't watch the two-hour first half of Spike Lee's new documentary about hurricane Katrina on HBO last night, be warned: it's hard to watch. The thing that caught me most off guard was the few shots of bodies bloated and floating in the water. It was horrific.

The documentary consists mostly of interviews with locals and officials and clip footage of New Orleans and the hurricane. And to Spike's credit, he made the decision early on to focus on New Orleans as microcosm of the disaster. What you begin to see (and remember from a year ago) is how much like American refugees the people of New Orleans become. Many had no way to leave the city pre-hurricane--there was no good evacuation plan for the poor, homeless, and elderly. When some tried to walk across the bridge into other cities, cops met them with rifles and shotguns.

Watching the smug and innefectual Bush do nothing to rally his cronies (Rice, Brown, and Chertoff) is just mind-numbing. Truly unbelievable. But props to the public officials who were interviewed. Neither Nagan nor Blanco have anything to be proud of, but both help to provide a real history of what happened. Perhaps my favorite talking head was CNN anchor Soledad O'Brien. She shows a real rage and bewilderment and how our federal government can get aid to Tsunami victims across the world in 2 days , when it takes 5 days to get aid to one of our own cities. It's astounding.

Race Riots on Survivor!

Not really...but methinks there is some drama in the newest evolution of the hit show: the buzz is that Survivor cast meembers will be grouped by race into four tribes in the new season. Of course they have grouped already by age and sex, so this isn't all that new. But I feel race is a little more touchy a subject. A few years back, Real World/Road Rules Challenge was going to do an entire season with gays versus straights. But right before they started filming, MTV balked. I wonder if this Survivor will actually be filmed with tribes in racial groups, or if it too will be an incendiary idea that falls by the wayside.

Prison Break Death?

Holy crap! Don't read if you missed Prison Break last night. In the last few minutes of the show, one of the main characters was killed off! I didn't see it coming at all, but goodbye Robin Tunney's character, Veronica. (I would shed a little tear but I never really liked her to begin with).

I Feel Pretty

If you haven't seen the new Nike commercial with Maria Sharapova, do yourself a favor and take a look. Maybe it's because I'm gay the spot involves showtunes, I don't know, but this commercial is absolutely genius.

On the Tube Tonight

Hey, a few things not to miss on TV tonight:

• The season premiere of Prison Break which promises to continue its sexy man factor, as the inmates have escaped and are running from The Law.
• It's the penultimate episode of this season's Kyle XY on ABC Family.
• I'm really not a fan of Spike Lee at all, but his first half of the documentary When the Levees Broke begins tonight on HBO.
• I'm going to skip the series premiere of Vanished on Fox tonight. It's gotten so-so buzz. But if any of you watch it and it's good, be sure to let me know.

Kal Penn to 24!

I love me some Kal Penn, so I'm happy to hear he's joining Kiefer and his cadre on 24. Harold and Kumar Go to Whitecastle wasn't the best movie ever, but there were some scenes that made me laugh my ass off. Go rent the movie and you can see a nice scene of Kal (Kumar) doing a little manscaping.

Give Samuel L. Jackson a Parachute!

Well...Snakes on a Plane did lousy business its opening weekend. But is that any surprise? Sure, it had a great internet campaign. Yeah, it was cool that Jackson would leave voice mail messages for people. And the title rocked. But what studio heads can't seem to understand is that if the movie blows, no matter how fucking badass the actors in it, nobody wants to see it. And the studio had to know the movie was a stinker--they didn't even let critics advance screen it.

Everyone I know said the same thing about Snakes on a Plane, "I'm thinking about going to see the movie, but it's probably going to stink, so I should get drunk first." Maybe one day the studios will learn...but my guess is not that soon.

DUI for Sixth Sense Star

Yeah, yeah, I could say, "I see drunk people." But I won't. What I will say is that Haley Joel Osment is only 18 years old and he's already started his short road to Mel Gibson-like behavior. I often wonder how stars in Hollywood get served alcohol when they're under 21, but I guess just because it's Hollywood. But the real question is, why didn't the little tike have someone driving him around--he's got the money.

Justin Timberlake has Balls of Jell-O

I actually was kind of impressed yesterday when Justin Timberlake said that American Idol winner Taylor Hicks "can't carry a tune in a bucket." Ahhhh, but then the publicists got involved. Now Timberlake's people are saying it was a misunderstanding and that his comments were taken out of context. So in one day Justin went from a man with balls of steel to a man with balls of Jell-O.

JonBenet...for the record

I don't think this guy killed JonBenet. I think he's nuts. Most everyone in Atlanta (and probably across the world) feels JonBenet's parents had a hand in her murder. Especially her mother. I'm just saying that for the record. What do y'all think?

Work Out Review

First off, I was silly to ever think my beautiful Jesse could be fired from Jackie's gym on Work Out. I totally fell for the preview from the week before where Jackie said, "Enough. I'm done." Turns out she was just telling Jesse to leave her office. Ten minutes more into this week's show and Jesse has led a great bootcamp class so he and Jackie are again BFF.

Um, is anyone else noticing how crazy Jackie's girlfriend is? Not only does she look 40 (and she's only 26!) but she bites Jackie any chance she gets. Jackie should ditch Mimi. I hope she does!

Michael Does the ATL Proud on Project Runway

I'm more and more convinced that each new challenge on Project Runway is an elaborate excuse to make Tim Gunn wear or carry something funny. Last night the contestants went to a recycling plant in Newark, New Jersey where they got materials for a their outfits. Of course we got to see Tim and the contestants in yellow jackets, safety goggles, and yellow hard hats. There is something so incongruous about prim and propper Tim Gunn all suited up like a sanitation worker, and of course the producers know that.

Buy yay for Atlanta designer Michael! I'm so happy he won his second challenge in a row, but even more happy that "my head is too small for my neck" Jeffrey didn't win. I would like to the site and show a pic or two, but as usual, the site isn't working again.

Laguna Beach Returns to TV Tonight

Ahhh...the fluffy, bitchy, meathead goodness that is Laguna Beach. How I've missed the lives of the rich, entitled, vapid OC teens; I'm so glad it starts again tonight on MTV. This season brings a whole fresh crop of what I hope to be devastatingly arrogant, egocentric, dumbass kids. Sadly, none of the main guys are as hot as old Laguna's Jason, but what can you do?

Make Samuel L. Jackson Work for You

If you go to this part of the Snakes on a Plane website, you can get Samuel L. Jackson to leave a friend a voicemail message about his movie. It's pretty funny. Coworker Michael showed me.

Hooking Up on Project Runway

Reality Blurred has a great post today about some lovin' on last season's Project Runway. Turns out there was some sumpin sumpin going on in one of those Atlas apartments. The rogues gallery includes: Andre, Daniel, Nick (sigh), and Santino (barf). My bet is that Daniel got it on with Andre or Nick. That seems about right. Of course I'm also convinced that Daniel and Tim Gunn hooked up. What do y'all think?

Money in a Bag

This story about the gift bags at the upcoming Emmy Awards is really interesting. Evidently the gift bags for nominees are worth between $27,000 and $33,000 dollars and nominees are expected to report the gifts as income for tax purposes. The article mentions that the 2006 Oscar gift bags netted the IRS more than $1.2 million in taxes! Go to the article to read the entire contents of the Emmy bags. It's revolting how much free these mega-rich people get: $1,500 Morton's Steakhouse gift certificate, a string of pearls, 6 nights at a ranch in Hawaii, leather roller luggage, and on and on...

Maggie Grace Back on Lost?

Kristin at EOnline reported an interesting Lost tidbit yesterday on her weekly blog: there are rumors going around that Maggie Grace will be reprising her role as Shannon on the hit show. Because most of the Lost characters share strangely linked pasts, Shannon could certainly show up in someone else's flashback. Let's hope so...I feel a little part of the show died with Shannon.

Boy George and Trash

I think Boy George has too many problems for us to take pleasure in his misfortune. I'll be honest, I feel a little sorry for him. For the next 5 days he has to pick up trash in NYC. You can read about it here. (Oh, and the sanitation worker showing him how to sweep is kinda cute).

Dancing with the Stars

If you have never watched the craziness that is Dancing with the Stars, this year is the time to watch the ABC show. The c-list celebrities who are participating have been named by TV Guide and include: Harry Hamlin, Mario Lopez, Joey Lawrence, Vivica A. Fox, Jerry Springer, and....it's almost too good to be true, political pundit Tucker Carlson. It's funny what someone will do to bring ratings to his show.

Paris Hilton ATTACKED! BITTEN!

...by her pet kinkajou, Baby Luv. If you're wondering what a kinkajou is (as I wondered), then visit Wikipedia. It's a rainforest mammal much like a raccoon. But this animal attack story has so much going for it, that I think we need to walk through this together.

1) Why does Paris Hilton have a kinkajou? Is it legal? If it is legal, is she allowed to walk it around town on a leash?
2) Why the Hell did she name a jungle mammal Baby Luv?
3) How fucking funny is it that her beloved Baby Luv bit her and she had to go to the hospital?
4) Can you imagine being Paris' publicist and getting a 3 a.m. phone call from the hospital because of Baby Luv's attack?
5) MTV actually showed a clip of Baby Luv trying to bite Paris the same day she went to the hospital. It's on the TMZ site.

Crazy Britney Spears

You have got to watch this video. It's at the bottom of the linked page. Britney is disoriented, crazy, and appears to be drunk or high. It's a riot.

I Wanna Be a Soap Star Ends Horribly

After a few months of half-assed watching I Wanna Be a Soap Star on Soap Net, I got a bit hooked. It was like watching a horrible horrible train wreck, but with people who had good hair. There were 10 contestants and most of them were pretty good. But the whole competition there was this one guy, Mikey, who couldn't memorize lines, couldn't act his way out of a paper bag, but the judges said he had a "likeability factor." Well, he won last night over my new-age Courtney Cox lookalike--Kelly.

I admit I was sad and a bit angry over his win. If all they wanted was a pretty face, why even go through the motions of having an acting contest. I mean, Mikey can't say the word "parade." He pronounces it "parody" during a karoake competition--watch it. And if you want a real laugh, watch the first two clips on this page: the producers synch in new-age music as Kelly describes how she has learned to be "emotionally clean"; and Mikey shows us how hiccupping and burping help him cry in sad scenes. I'm not kidding.

The Death Knell of Lost?

A few months ago I predicted that Lost would go the way of Alias--that its producers would get so many kudos they would start getting more work on other shows and spread their time too thin. Then it looked like, "well, maybe notsomuch--J.J. is coming back to write and direct."

Well, today at TV Guide there is an article about J.J. Abrams new Star Trek movie (he will produce and may direct). And guess what? Turns out he is also employing one of the main Lost producers on the movie too. Damon Lindelof will also produce. So it doesn't look good for Lost. I have a feeling Lindelof will go the way of J.J. Abrams and David E. Kelly--getting too busy for his own good. And that can only detract from the quality of the show.

Project Runway Surprise

No, it wasn't a shock that Bradley was given the boot. The surpise is that for two competitions in a row Angela has had a nice, no, a really nice design. Maybe she needs to be "inspired" to do good work. Her inspiration last week (which I didn't really buy) was the Empire State Building and this week it was Audrey Hepburn. I didn't know that the cargo pants-wearing Angela, with all her crazy scrunchy skirts, had a good design or two in her. Color me puzzled.

Now, I don't think Angela's got a chance in Hell to win. My bet's still on Uli. But wasn't it great to see all the designers with their models and their 70's fashion icons? I loved it. Kudos to Kayne and to Michael for their great designs too. And honestly, wasn't it a much-deserved win for Michael? His hot pink Pam Grier look was rockin'.

They're Making it Easy to Catch Up on Galactica

SciFi Channel must know it has a hit on its hands. The 3rd season of Battlestar Galactica will start this October, but the channel has created a catch up show: The Story So Far. The show will air on SciFi, Bravo, USA and a number of other new networks so that nearly everyone on the planet can take part in the crazy-ass drama excitement of (and I'll probably say this again) the best show on television. Not just the best scifi show--the best show.

Family Infighting

ABC's new fall show Brothers and Sisters has undergone a lot of changes and we're not even to fall yet. Makes me think it's either going to be a brilliant show, or just a huge mess.

The show's original matriarch was actress Betty Buckley, who left a month or so ago and was replaced by Sally Field. And now there's word that the show's head writer Marti Noxon (of Buffy fame) is leaving because of "creative differences" with the show runner. It's a shame this is shaping up to be a long haul for this show because it boasts some fine actors: Calista Flockhart, Rachel Griffiths, Ron Rifkin, Patricia Wettig, Tom Skerritt and Balthazar Getty.

Anniston and Vaughn to Wed

Us magazine is running a story that Jennifer Anniston and Vince Vaughn are (finally) engaged. I don't care much about this story, though they're both really talented comedians. I'll admit when Brad and Jennifer broke up I was a bit sad for Jennifer. I do think it's worked out great though.

A) From what I hear, Brad literally stinks. Like he doesn't shower, which is why Paltrow broke up with him years ago. And B) though Angelina is a great actress, she's a skank. I mean...anyone who ever carried a vile of Billy Bob Thornton's blood around her neck...well, I just don't want to say. So Stank and Skank belong together as far as I'm concerned.

I'm Worried About Jessie on Workout

Last night on Workout Jessie watched Jackie's house in Hollywood and a mini party ensued. So this next week the previews show him getting in trouble--Jackie says, "We're through" and I can't tell if she means "leave my office" or "you're fired." I hope it's the former.

But....go to Bravo and you can watch Jessie doing a great chest workout. Grrr....And the pic above is from a series of Jesse glute excercise pics.

Aquaman TV Pilot

The Aquaman tv pilot, starring former Passions hottie Justin Hartley, is the #1 downloaded show on iTunes right now. There's some speculation that if enough people watch the pilot, the CW may change its mind and pick the show up which is produced by the Smallville team. My guess is that filming a show with underwater scenes (and scenes on the water) just is too expensive, but I sure would love to see Hartley shirtless every week.

The pilot wasn't fantastic, but it wasn't bad either, much like Smallville. I could definitely see there were places it could go, so I'm little sad the show wasn't picked up for the fall. Maybe everything new on the CW will suck this fall and Aquaman will be a midseason replacement. Or maybe this is all a ruse to get interest in a show which is secretly slated to start midseason.

Project Runway Soars

Evidently the ratings for last week's Project Runway episode where Keith was ejected for scandal were astronomical for Bravo. 3.4 million people watched on cable. Overall, Runway ratings are up way over last year. Here's hoping that Vincent or little-head-big-neck Jeff is gone tonight--but I don't it. You know producers like to keep the crazies on as long as they can.

Tori Spelling's Woes

I read today that Tori Spelling had planned a really nice tribute to her father Aaron, to air on ABC this fall. Several stars of his past shows had already taped interviews and Tori was working to produce the show when Mommy Dearest (Candy Spelling) pulled the plug. According to the report, she wouldn't release any of the clips from shows like Dynasty and The Love Boat once she heard Tori was involved in the project.

If you ask me, I do feel sorry for Tori. You know it was hard to grow up in a house like that with a father who basically knew everybody and a mother who has shown herself to be pretty controlling. So Tori goes out and starts her own show this year on VH1 which completely makes fun of herself and manages to have a few smallish barbs directed at her family, and Mommy Dearest goes even more wackoo. Keeps her from the funeral, releases awful statements to the press, gets involved in Tori's tribute. Someone died....a father, a husband, and a great tv producer. How about focusing on that instead of being petty.

Chris Daughtry Get Some New Digs

American Idol finalist Chris Daughtry has just bought a new house for $690,000. It's nearly 3,800 square feet and is in a small town called Oak Ridge in North Carolina. It's four bedrooms and...why am I even pretending to write something interesting? We all know it's just an excuse to post this cute pic.

Lindsay Lohan to Iraq?

I swear, what this girl won't do to get rid of that "false" party girl image. Now Lindsay Lohan is talking about going on a trip to Iraq with Hillary Clinton. She wants to "entertain" the troops. Er, not sure how that's going to work.

My favorite part of the report is this quote: "she would prepare for her trip to Iraq by taking shooting lessons with her security guard." WTF? I'm sure the army won't give her a gun to defend herself, so what's she gonna do, smuggle one in?

$1 Million to Paris Hilton

Oh yeah, when I mentioned that story about Paris Hilton being savvy yesterday, I forgot to point out that her "famous just for being 'famous'" act has gotten her $1 million dollar gigs just to wave at crowds.

P. Diddy as James Bond???

I have no idea if this is true, but The Sun is reporting this James Bond-related tidbit by Jamie Foxx. he thinks that P. Diddy should have earned the upcoming James Bond slot over the actor Daniel Craig. Okaaaaay....a black James Bond isn't a bad idea, but A) P. Diddy can't act. So that might be a problem there. B) Daniel Craig is an actor. Hmmm...

I think Foxx is a no-talent in dramatic roles. I'll admit I've never seen Ray, but every other "dramatic" performance I've seen by Foxx has been laughable. And now he has this "great" album out. I hope he goes the way of Eddie Murphy and "Party all the Time."

Studio Execs to Tom Cruise: Have a "Reality Check"

The karma-thon continues. Another article about Tom Cruise and Paramount. The annual deal he has had with Paramount for 13-years was not renewed this year because Cruise wanted too much money. I guess he didn't realize what a joke he's become. The article says studio execs think Cruise faces "a reality check and finanical adjustment." I love it.

Bush in the Toilet

It's great that Bush's poll numbers are down, but what about this: Americans 18 to 24 give him only a 20% approval rating. That's compared to the 40% approval rating among Americans of all ages. Doesn't it give you a bit of hope to know the kids aren't falling for his shit, like their parents and grandparents?

Paris Hilton = Prude?

Okay...you have to hand it to Paris. The girl is her own PR machine. If a week or two goes by and there hasn't been a big Paris scoop, of course she releases some tidbit: she's back with an ex; she's really only "playing" a character; or maybe even that she's taking a year off sex.

I would say that she is boatloads of crazy, but the thing is it doesn't even matter that we'll all seen Paris in sex tape--Paris is getting us to talk about her. So she may not be that smart, she may not have that much style, but she sure gets the attention everytime she wants it and that shows that either a) there's something going on upstairs in that head of hers; or b) she's hired a great great publicist.

Kyle XY and Three Moons Over Milford

I'm completely embarrassed to admit this, but I'm now following not one, but two shows on ABC Family channel! Believe it or not, they're both really good. Maybe a touchy syrupy, but still great. The first is Kyle XY about this kind of super-savaant kid who has no memory, and the second show is Three Moons Over Milford which concerns the goings-on in a small Vermont town when the moon has cracked in three and everyone thinks the world is going to end.

Both scifi shows are a bit overacted, but have great plots and one or two stand-out actors. For Kyle XY, it's the title character played by Matt Dallas. Everything he sees or hears is new to him and his big innocent eyes do the trick. For Milford, the stand-out actress is the Elizabeth McGovern. True, sometimes she's a bit cloying, but I have a feeling it's a show that will "grow on you."

Mel Gibson Rehab Alert

I read a report today that Mel Gibson is in out-patient rehab. I don't know enough about rehab to have an "educated" opinion. But my snarky opinion is that the unpublished version of rehab he's chosen is just like his apology: empty. A way for him not to take responsibility for his bigotted actions.

Also, I read that Jodie Foster says about Mel: "Is he an anti-semite? Absolutely not." Of course, I wonder how much faith we should hold in Foster's opinion, when everyone in the world (including my Grandmother, Gaggie) knows that she leads an "in-the-closet" life.

Watch Tonight!

Don't forget to watch James Roday on USA's Psych tonight. And if you're too busy, you can always download it on your computer through iTunes. The show is really spectacularly funny.

Whose Bitch is Richard Hatch?

While we don't know the answer to that question...yet...we do know a little bit more about the Federal prison where Survivor's first season winner Richard Hatch is staying. The prison is in Morgantown, West Virginia and holds 1,200 inmates in an all-male, minimum security setting.

There are go locks on doors, no guard towers, and if he doesn't A) escape; B) get released early; or C) get transferred to a fourth prison; Hatch will be out in October 2009.

Meathead Quote of the Week

"I'm not scared whatsoever to go up against a gay guy and a skinny girl."
--Wes, meathead from MTV's Fresh Meat (and he's not cute enough for me to post a pic)

Roman Church Officials Shame Madonna? Yawn....

Several Catholic and Jewish religious leaders in Rome are up in arms about Madonna's upcoming concert at Rome's Olympic Stadium. It's funny that they would even try to dissuade people from attending the concert--we all know it will give her tour even more publicity.

In other Madonna news, she has pledged $3 million to children in the African country of Malawi.

Project Runway

Last night's Project Runway was fantastic. Everybody I know was trying to figure out who was going to get thrown off, and I'm glad it was Keith. He's such a putz. If you didn't watch, Keith evidently 1) left the show for a few hours and researched designs on the Internet; and b) brought some pattern-making books to the show. Both are no-no's.

Keith said, “I didn’t expect this. … My image has been tarnished forever, I’m off the show, and I’m going to be a laughing stock to my friends.” Karma alert! Karma alert!

Katherine McClumsy and Queer Eye

• Katherine McPhee tripped backstage on the American Idol tour and broke her foot. But she is going to stay with the tour. What a trooper...
• Maybe I was on to something talking about Jai from Queer Eye the other day. Turns out Bravo says they are planning for more of the show in 2007. Maybe, just maybe, they'll hire someone instead of Jai! We can hope.
  

Mid-week TV Tidbits

• Amy Sherman-Palladino, the creator of Gilmore Girls, has gotten a deal to write and executive produce (and perhaps even direct) a new 1/2 hour dramedy on Fox.
• Jai Rodriquez says the Fab Five of the Queer Eye team haven't been approached about a new season, so this one may be the last. Though with Jai, it could just be that everyone else but him was approached.
• Julianna Margulies, straight off her stint on the The Sopranos, has joined the upcoming SciFi miniseries The Lost Room starring Peter Krause of Six Feet Under fame.

It's all about Ambiance...

Netflix is organizing this really cool movie festival called the Rolling Roadshow. They are showing movies in the areas they were filmed or took place. Kevin Costern is hosting Field of Dreams in the famous cornstalk baseball field he made famous in Dyersville, Iowa. Other movies include Jaws at Martha's Vineyard, and perhaps the coolest: The Shining in Estes Park, Colorado.

Harry Potter Casualties List

This news story on J.K. Rowling is fascinating and not just because Stephen King and John Irving are pressuring the author not to kill Harry Potter. The story gets at the real forethought it takes to publish a series of books such as the seven Harry Potters. Rowling says she has always kept a list of characters who would die, so when it came to writing the death scenes it seemed less poingnant.

About the last Harry Potter book, Rowling says, "We're working toward the end I always planned but a couple of characters I expected to survive have died and one character got a reprieve."

Bad News for Tom Cruise is Good News for Us

Tom Cruise has had a development deal with Paramount Pictures for over 1o years now. This deal gave him upwards of $10 million a year just to develop movies. But after the disappointment of Mission Impossible III (and perhaps Tom's crazy Scientologist behavior) Paramount is cutting back. The once $10 million+ is now a paltry (to Cruise's standards) $2 million a year.

Turns out Paramount may just break even after MI III grossed only $381 million. Do you see that in the distance? As all the stars seem to be aligning to fight the crazy behavior of ego-driven Hollywood quacks (Cruise, Lohan, Gibson), Tom Cruise's own personal star seems to be shining a little less brightly. Maybe even fading...

Mel Apologizes to the Jewish Community

The Drudge Report has posted an apology from Mel Gibson specifically aimed at Jews. In part it says, "There is no excuse, nor should there be any tolerance, for anyone who thinks or expresses any kind of Anti-Semitic remark. I want to apologize specifically to everyone in the Jewish community for the vitriolic and harmful words that I said to a law enforcement officer the night I was arrested on a DUI charge."

Even more interesting, Mel goes on to talk about deep-seated anti-semitic feelings he may have: "I am in the process of understanding where those vicious words came from during that drunken display, and I am asking the Jewish community, whom I have personally offended, to help me on my journey through recovery."

It sounds pretty sincere, but who knows.

News on 24, Lost, and Prison Break

Kristin at E! has some great scoop on these three shows:

• A Lost producer says when it comes to the character of Libby, "obviously we left the audience dangling." It is their intention to get at more of Libby's backstory with Hurley and Desmond.
• Jean Smart will rock our worlds again next year on 24!
• The upcoming 24 movie and television show will occur during the same time period. My guess is creating a synergy between what happens in each.
• The escaped convicts from Prison Break will be on the run next season and won't be staying together in one big pack. But look for them to all come together again as they try to find the $5 million that they know is buried in the Utah desert.

You Gotta Watch Psych

My cable box has been on the fritz and I don't get USA Network anymore. So tonight I bought the second and third episodes of the show Psych on iTunes and I'm convinced more than ever that it is the can't-miss show of the summer!

"Gus, you have got to stop calling your nose the super smeller. You want to nickname a body part? Nickname your butt, man. Call it the tight bouncer. Or the hexagon. The ladies are gonna dig that. I'm telling ya."
--Shawn, genius detective and fake psychic

Smile for the Camera!

A few interesting Mel Gibson tidbits:
1) The police finally released the mug shot. Nice.
2) Turns out that the arresting deputy James May is...wait for it...wait for it...(I swear I'm not making this up) Jewish. Yep, Mr. Gibson couldn't have put his foot any further in his mouth.
3) Gibson has done what any self-respecting star who needs to bide his time while caught in an anti-semitic scandal would do: go to rehab. I think he's hoping we'll feel sorry he has drinking issues and forget that he's a bigot.

Republicans to Katherine Harris: Get Out!

This week has brought a really nice round of karmic "you-get-what-you-deserve." To continue this trend, the Florida Republication party is dumping Katherine Harris: "We have determined that your campaign faces irreparable damage...We feel that we have no other choice but to revoke our support."

The only thing that could make this karma-thon better is for Karl Rove to be caught committing felonous or treasonous activity. Oh wait, did that already happen a few months ago? I guess getting caught and prosecuted are two different things.

More Jason Love

Okay, I know this isn't the best pic of him, and he does need to cut his hair, but good news: Reality Blurred is reporting that MTV's The Hills has been picked up for a 2nd season. That means a) we get more Jason love; and b) more opportunities to see Heidi act stupid. I can't wait.

And the thing that makes pick-up of the 2nd season even sweeter is that poor Kristin (the bitchy "star" of Laguna Beach) couldn't even parlay her "fame" into one full season of a new show.

Hemingway's Cats

I'm glad the US Government is concerned about the things that really make a difference in our lives. I certainly consider the regulation of the late Ernest Hemingway's 6-toed cats in Key West a very high priority.

Whaaaa? The USDA is threatening to fine the Hemingway estate $200 per cat per day until the cats are caged, or the estate gets a special zoo-type license. Nevermind that there is a 6-foot brick wall around the area. Nevermind that the cats and the home bring in countless tourism dollars to the economy. Nevermind that the local government has no issue with the cats. I'm glad the Federal Government is able to intervene is such grave matters. Ugh.

My Life on the D-List

According to RealityBlurred, My Life on the D-List still hasn't been renewed by Bravo. I have to wonder, what the hell are they waiting for? Ratings are up, the show has buzz, and it earned an Emmy nomination. There is speculation that if Bravo doesn't pony up the money, VH-1 will.

Harry Potter Naked?

Today is a slow day so far, so I'll link to this article about Daniel Radcliffe from last week.

Mel Gibson: Victim of His Own Stupidity?

Gosh, it's terrible when you're a star and your actions actually have consequences! I mean, can you imagine how catastrophic it would be to drive drunk? No, you didn't hit anyone or drive off a cliff or anything--but what if your anti-semitism were to rear its ugly head, or your movie career were to be tarnished? I mean, shouldn't we all feel sorry for Mel Gibson? Ugh.

TMZ quotes uber-publicist Michael Levine regarding Mel Gibson's recent DUI arrest and volatile, anti-semetic tirade: "It's a nuclear disaster for him. I don't see how he can restore himself."

The director of the Anti-Defamation League, Abraham Foxman, says: "We would hope that Hollywood now would realize the bigot in their midst and that they will distance themselves from this anti-Semite."

Stagemom Alert! Stagemom Alert!

In the ever-continuing saga of Lindsay Lohan, it turns out the star's mom isn't too happy about her daughter being called out by a Hollywood movie producer. (Remember last week how Lindsay was hand-delivered a letter saying she was a "spoiled child" for stopping Georgia Rule production for two days). Lohan's mom says, "I feel like when you are 19...it is way out of line." She follows by quoting the words of the "heat exhausted" Lindsay: "Mommy, I feel sick; like I am going to faint."

Uh huh. Well, let's not forget this 19 year-old is making millions...and every time she's late or doesn't show up it costs other people money. Oh, and let's also try to remember that this isn't the first time Lindsay's left a movie for "heat exhaustion."

Katie Couric: A Diva on Delta?

My friend Jeff passed this along: Katie Couric delayed a Delta flight from Washington to New York last Wednesday. The plane had closed its doors and was about to taxi to the runway when Katie got permission to visit the cockpit and ask the pilots to wait for one of her news producers.

Jeff also reminds me that while talking up her new CBS news job, Katie's been saying over and over that she wants to end the "pretentious era" of network news. Well, I guess that means that only she can be pretentious or a diva.

Entourage Quote of the Week

It's a tie between two Hollywood super agent Ari Gold quotes this week. You pick:

1) "It's not true, Shauna. Tell Variety they can suck my balls....but, you know, clean it up."

2) "I always knew you like dick, Babs. I just didn't know you were a cocksucker."