The Monday after Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows came out, my friend Lars and I had lunch at a Greek restaurant to discuss the book. I had torn through the book and finished it that past Saturday afternoon, but Lars had only read the last few pages that morning. We decided we should compare notes.
As we began to discuss the book, a woman suddenly looked over and glared at us. I saw her clutching the tell-tale yellow hardcover book in her hands as tightly as if it were the ring in The Lord of the Rings, or even a horcrux you might say. Now, a small part of me understands her frustration, but what I can't comprehend is how she could expect to move through the world and not be spoiled by the fastest, best-selling book ever. It's like people who say to me, "don't go talking about Lost tomorrow, I'm not going to be able to watch it until this weekend." They say this knowing the season finale is all anyone will be talking about the next day. WTF?
Granted, I've got a big mouth. But I feel like the onus about not being spoiled is on the person terrified of being spoiled. And there's a really simple solution to not being spoiled: read the damn book.
I can already hear it from some of you: "easier said than done." Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, I read blazingly fast. And yes, it's a 759 page book. (Oh, does that count as a spoiler?) But if you know that this book is coming out, plan ahead people. Go ahead and get the other books out of the way. Cancel that weekend trip you were gonna take.
Anyway...I wanted to get this off my chest. I have some very lovely friends--many many in fact--who have not finished the book. Most have asked politely, "Oh, please don't talk to me about Harry Potter until I'm done." And with that kind of request, I'm more than happy to oblige. It's just that every time I opened my mouth last week, about ANYTHING...some friends and colleagues would offer a loud SHHHHH! So I'm tired of it.
I'm free of my Harry Potter bonds and I'm coming out of the closet. Yes, I've read the last Harry Fucking Potter. Every page. Every word. And at any moment I can tell you whether he lives or dies. In fact, fair warning...tomorrow I'm discussing it in detail.
1 comment:
"Granted, I've got a big mouth."
Methinks that part of the problem is that there has NEVER been a secret you didn't want to be the person to let others in on. Your big mouth is responsible for the people telling you to shut up before you get the first word out.
Also? You act like single people have more of a right to enjoy unadulterated readings of Harry than people with kids, or three jobs, or who maybe have a death in the family the week it comes out. I do not have time to sit around and finish Harry Potter in 24 hours. Period. Maybe that poor woman who glared at you at the Greek place had been up till 2 am with her kid. Have a little, oh, i don't know. . . mercy.
I love you. And i have finished it now, so go crazy.
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